The Princess Rx

During the course of seven weeks of radiation treatments, the oncologist suggested to me that my family should be treating me like a princess while I'm enduring the daily ordeal. He said someone should be bringing my tea to me. My initial reaction was that he meant I was to be pampered. After I left his office I mulled over his suggestion, and I'm not so sure that pampering is the norm for princesses.

My knowledge of princesses comes mostly from fairy tales and movies, but from what I've heard, princesses aren't treated all that well. 
  • Often they are locked up in solitary confinement or imprisoned in a tower. The princess must wait, and wait, and wait for the right prince to come along and save her. Her freedom will come at a price, though. She'll have to marry the guy who broke her out.
  • Princesses do a lot of kissing, but many times they find themselves kissing frogs or beasts. In at least one instance, the princess had to lie dead in the forest until a prince came along and kissed her awake. I have to admit, this might help me wake up in the mornings.
  • The usual transportation for a real princess is horse and carriage. That might sound romantic, but who's got time for that? I'd never get half my errands run if I had to make stops to water the horses. There's not enough time in the day as it is.
  • Princesses are expected to attend formal balls and dance the night away. Some girls might be into that, but I'm too much of an introvert to enjoy the social scene on a regular basis, not to mention my two left feet.
  • A princess is often bossed around by a wicked step-mother or perhaps put under a vile spell by an evil queen. That does not sound like pampering to me.
Considering all the hardships princesses face, I hope my family will disregard the doctor's advice about giving me the princess treatment. I'll pass on the Rx and get my own tea, thank you.


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